Caustic Cocoa Cranberry Galette.

This was a big fat fail, people.


It was bound to happen. You can’t make 52 amazing pies in a row. Well, maybe Martha Stewart or a Stepford Wife can (aren’t those the same? jk Martha I kind of love you), but I can’t. What made this failure such a bummer though was that it was SO CLOSE to being awesome, and because I sort of foresaw the failure but didn’t fix it. Let me explain.


I’ve been heading out of town for work a bunch lately, to attend conferences, and it’s been really throwing off my pie schedule. I didn’t want to get behind so on Saturday night I realized I had to make a pie or I’d miss a week of this project. By the time I realized this on Saturday, it was getting mighty close to dinner and I wanted to make something that wouldn’t require any grocery shopping. I needed a pie that I could make with what I already had in my house.


I remembered that I had a bag of cranberries in the freezer from December when I canned cranberry sauce. I googled the words “cranberry galette” and lo and behold, many recipes popped up. Most of them were Cranberry and Apple galettes though, with the emphasis on the Apple. But two in particular sparked my interest: this one, and this one. How could I resist the addition of dark cocoa to the pie? I thought it would be just the ticket – something we could have for dessert Saturday night and not too sweet that I couldn’t eat a piece (or two) with coffee on Sunday morning. But you might notice something – one of those recipes calls for 1 cup of sugar, and one calls for 1/2 cup of sugar – and the one with less sugar also has unsweetened cocoa in it! I did not know how to proceed. I usually opt for the lesser amount of sugar because I don’t have much of a sweet tooth, but then again, cranberries are really tart on their own. I thought that the best thing would be a compromise – 3/4 cup of sugar and the cocoa. But then I poured 1/2 cup of sugar into my bowl and it looked like A LOT. So I didn’t add any more.


That galette was so tart and acidic that it burned, people. It stung the back of my throat in this way that I thought only vomit could. I wasn’t actually going to write that because it is a disgusting thought, but I couldn’t find other words that could accurately conjure up the experience of eating this pie. It was so sad because it smelled incredible when I took it out of the oven. I wished so hard that I had put that extra sugar in. But, you can’t win em all people. That said, the crust was mighty fine, and that’s the point of this anyways isn’t it? 


2 thoughts on “Caustic Cocoa Cranberry Galette.

  1. while i agree it is a disgusting thought, i am so glad you wrote it anyways because i literally LAUGHED OUT LOUD. any chance a good ice cream could save this?!? wish i lived closer to partake in these pies!!

  2. Ha! The vomit comment probably articulated the taste perfectly. Cranberries totally can take on a bile-like tartness, I used to be into that when I was a kid… On another note, where’s our invitation to all your pie parties? X

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